Opinion: Finding your flock

Have you ever looked to the sky, seen a flock of birds, and wondered, “Why do they want to fly together?” And have you ever looked at a group of people and thought, “Why do they want to be together?”

It is well known that birds do not choose to fly together for the good company. Unlike birds, a person’s personality is one of the deciding factors of whether or not people choose to become friends with him or her.

Friends are really interesting thing. You meet a person, talk for a bit, and then at some point become comfortable with him or her and decide, “Hey, this one is different. I want to be with this one.” Some friends last a lifetime, others last a month or two. Twenty years ago, the likelihood of staying in contact with your high school or college friends after school was very low. Now, with the help of Facebook and other social media sites, we are able to (kind of) continue with the people we shared the “best years of our lives” with.

Although there is no equation for friendship, friends usually have common interests and common social lives, such little things to base a relationship that can grow into sister/brotherly friendship.

Some people have hundreds of friends; others have one or two. Some people chose to have no close friends; others are too socially inept to approach the subject.

Because friends can be so close, it is important that we choose people who we can trust with our lives and our confidence. After being friends with someone who treats people like they (you especially) do not not matter, and it becomes a social norm for you.

If someone has friends who are constantly putting them down that person will be more apt to believe that these insults are real. Friendships can be very dangerous for some people. Getting into a toxic friendship is a slow and painful process that can take a long term toll on a  person’s confidence.

Friendships like this do exist for many years. Until something reminds them that friends make other friends happy, friends willing to put their pride aside for their friends, and friends do whatever they need to when other friends need help. Friends do not hurt each other.

Take a second to look at your best friends, and think about why you want to be with them, if you think they are still proper friends. If not, think about finding a new flock to fly with.